Opinion Blog

Ask a Psychologist

Helping Students Thrive Now

Angela Duckworth and other behavioral-science experts offer advice to teachers based on scientific research. Read more from this blog.

Student Well-Being & Movement Opinion

How to Set a Moral Example for Students: What the Research Shows

What challenging yourself to do better can accomplish
By William Fleeson — September 07, 2022 1 min read
How do I teach students about morality when I'm not perfect?
  • Save to favorites
  • Print

This is the second in a two-part series on morals. You can read the first one here.

How do I teach students about morality when I’m not perfect?

You can turn that concern into a challenge to do better. Here’s something I wrote about the topic for Character Lab as a Tip of the Week:

Studying exceptionally moral people can be hard on the ego.

These people’s lives put me to shame. Dorothy Day, for example, founded the Catholic Worker movement in 1933 to feed and house the poor during the Great Depression; it now serves nearly 200 communities around the world. Protesting injustice, she gave up her freedom for her principles and was jailed for the first time as a teenager and the last time at age 75.

For a while, I was kicking myself for falling short. But at some point, I realized that I can only do my best. It’s just a fact that my best isn’t as good as that of a woman who may be formally canonized.

But how quickly that response can become an excuse for not trying. If we see ourselves as weak, we may let ourselves get away with feeble, half-hearted efforts at morality. How can we accept our limits yet still be inspired by our idols?

Instead of copping out, we can step up. A recent study found that when people engaged in negative self-talk—saying to themselves something like, “Whoa, I screwed that up!"—their performance was mediocre. However, if they immediately followed that negative thought with a challenge—say, “Whoa, I screwed that up, but next time I know I can be better!"—their performance improved.

So when comparing yourself with exceptionally moral people, you can think, “My best is nowhere near as good as Dorothy Day’s best, but my best can become better.”

Don’t give up on behaving morally just because you’re nowhere close to sainthood.

Do challenge yourself to redouble your efforts when you fail to live up to your own principles and encourage the young people in your life to do the same. Tell them what Dorothy Day once said: “Don’t call me a saint—I don’t want to be dismissed that easily.” The moral of the story of Dorothy Day is, simply: We all can do better, if we try.

The opinions expressed in Ask a Psychologist: Helping Students Thrive Now are strictly those of the author(s) and do not reflect the opinions or endorsement of Editorial Projects in Education, or any of its publications.

Events

This content is provided by our sponsor. It is not written by and does not necessarily reflect the views of Education Week's editorial staff.
Sponsor
College & Workforce Readiness Webinar
Smarter Tools, Stronger Outcomes: Empowering CTE Educators With Future-Ready Solutions
Open doors to meaningful, hands-on careers with research-backed insights, ideas, and examples of successful CTE programs.
Content provided by Pearson
This content is provided by our sponsor. It is not written by and does not necessarily reflect the views of Education Week's editorial staff.
Sponsor
Professional Development Webinar
Recalibrating PLCs for Student Growth in the New Year
Get advice from K-12 leaders on resetting your PLCs for spring by utilizing winter assessment data and aligning PLC work with MTSS cycles.
Content provided by Otus
School Climate & Safety Webinar Strategies for Improving School Climate and Safety
Discover strategies that K-12 districts have utilized inside and outside the classroom to establish a positive school climate.

EdWeek Top School Jobs

Teacher Jobs
Search over ten thousand teaching jobs nationwide — elementary, middle, high school and more.
View Jobs
Principal Jobs
Find hundreds of jobs for principals, assistant principals, and other school leadership roles.
View Jobs
Administrator Jobs
Over a thousand district-level jobs: superintendents, directors, more.
View Jobs
Support Staff Jobs
Search thousands of jobs, from paraprofessionals to counselors and more.
View Jobs

Read Next

Student Well-Being & Movement How Do Teachers Rate Their Students' Self-Regulation Skills?
Students’ poor self-regulation skills hurt their ability to learn.
1 min read
Achieving equilibrium between positive and negative emotions, they counterbalance each other to cultivate a serene state of mind
iStock/Getty
Student Well-Being & Movement Spotlight Spotlight on The Science of Self-Regulation: The Missing Foundation of Academic Success
This Spotlight focuses on ways to build students’ self-management skills, a foundational predictor of academic success.
Student Well-Being & Movement Trump Admin. Pulls Student Mental Health Grants, Restores Them a Day Later
The Trump administration abruptly canceled a slate of mental health grants, only to reinstate them the next day.
5 min read
Notes from students expressing support and sharing coping strategies paper a wall, as members of the Miami Arts Studio mental health club raise awareness on World Mental Health Day on Oct. 10, 2023, at Miami Arts Studio, a public 6th-12th grade magnet school, in Miami.
Notes from students expressing support and sharing coping strategies paper a wall at the Miami Arts Studio, a middle and high school magnet school, on Oct. 10, 2023 in Miami. Federal grants to improve student mental health have had bipartisan support, but a recent blip in funding has made school districts and providers nervous.
Rebecca Blackwell/AP/AP
Student Well-Being & Movement Flu Is Hitting Schools Hard as Community Cases Surge
Some schools have closed buildings as flu cases have surged.
3 min read
Flu shot vaccines are seen in a refrigerator at International Community Health Services on Sept. 10, 2025, in Seattle.
Flu shot vaccines are seen in a refrigerator at International Community Health Services on Sept. 10, 2025, in Seattle. A decline in flu vaccinations this year could be one factor helping the spread of influenza.
Lindsey Wasson/AP